Patrick Schwerdtfeger is a motivational speaker who can cover the topic of ‘safety’ with respect to achieving your dreams and aspirations at your next business event. Contact us to check availability. The full transcript of the above video is included below.
Full Video Transcript:
Hi and welcome to another edition of Strategic Business Insights. Today we’re going to talk about achieving your dreams and whether or not it’s safe for you to do that. Is it safe for you to get what you want? A lot of people, including myself, we have these lofty dreams of things we want to achieve in our lives, but is it safe for us to get there? Way down deep inside, if we actually found ourselves in that position, are we ready to deal with the stresses that come with that dreams achievement?
Like, for example, myself, I wanted to be a speaker. I’ve wanted to do this since I was like 12 years old. This has been a dream of mine since I was very young. But if I actually got the dream accomplished and ended up being a professional speaker, I would have to stand in front of all these people and speak. It’s a very threatening place to be, and in the beginning I always worried that people might call me out as, you know, what right do you have to be on the stage speaking or what right do you have to do these things, or are you really an expert? That’s something that a lot of us deal with in the early days when we’re starting to establish ourselves. Are you really an expert? What does it take to be an expert?
So for me, I wrote books. I’ve published three books so far and hopefully there’ll be more coming. But why did I write those books? It wasn’t so much for the people who ended up reading them, although that in the end has become the most rewarding part of the exercise, but the actual reason I wrote those books was for myself. It was to convince myself that I have a right to do what it is that I wanted to do, because before I had done those things, before I had written those books, getting up in front of a group of people and speaking, it’s hard to do. It was threatening. I didn’t feel safe. So I had to build infrastructure ahead of time to make sure that if I got my goal, if I got my dream, if my dream came true, I would actually be able to stand in that place and accept that position. I had to make sure that I was safe in that situation.
So think to yourself, what’s your dream? What’s your work? We’ll talk about personal in just a second, but first, what’s your work, your business dream, your dream in business, your ultimate goal? Is it safe for you to be there? Is it safe for you to achieve that goal? If it’s not safe today, then probably you’re going to sabotage yourself one way or another to make sure you’re not in that situation. Subconsciously, we do these things all the time.
So what do you have to build ahead of time to make sure that you will feel safe if you achieve the goal that you want? Maybe it’s writing books. Maybe it’s having a bigger website or a bigger web presence. Maybe it’s doing videos like these. This is an opportunity also for me to establish myself and to share my thoughts and my beliefs in the public domain, right? And so, inevitably, I build some confidence because people are watching it and engaging with it. And some people like it, some people don’t, but the people who like it, it helps me to kind of feel safer being in that position of sharing my thoughts, of sharing my beliefs.
You have to do the same thing. Maybe it’s getting more credentials. Maybe it’s getting your MBA. Maybe it’s doing certain things. It could be anything. Think about the things that you have to do to build the infrastructure so that it’s safe for you to achieve the goals that you have in your business life.
And in your personal life, it’s really the same thing. Think about maybe a relationship that you’re in, your spouse or friends. What do you want personally? Is it safe for you to achieve it?
Let’s say, for example, you’re single and you want to be in a relationship. Well, is it safe for you to be in a relationship or would that situation cause you to confront some things in your personal life that maybe you don’t want to confront? Like maybe it’s not safe for you to be in that situation. Or maybe it’s the opposite – maybe you’re in a relationship and you want to be out of the relationship. Is it safe for you to go back into the singles world? Or is it safe for you to move to a new city and make new friends from scratch or leave your current friends behind and start making new friends? These are all transitions in our personal lives. Would it be safe for you to do that?
Would it be safe for you to even communicate the things that you’re actually thinking in your mind to the person in your life who means a lot to you or maybe the person you’re in a special relationship with? A lot of times people don’t say the things they want to say and they need to say because they know that if they say it they’re going to get attacked or judged by the other person, so it’s not safe for them to say it. And in some cases, that has more to do with the other person than it does with yourself. Like if the other person is an attacking person and you know that if you share your true feelings they’re just going to attack you and judge you, then maybe you’re better off not saying it. But it’s good for us to understand why we’re not saying it. We’re not saying it because it’s not safe for us to say it.
Or, maybe you’re in a relationship and the other person is not communicating with you. They’re probably not communicating with you because they don’t feel safe doing it. They feel like you’re going to judge them or you’re going to attack them. That’s what being a good listener is all about. You have to be open and listen without judgment and give them the space, give them the safety to express themselves without attacking and without judging. That’s when real conversations start.
So a lot of things in life, whether it’s in our business life or in our personal life, it really boils down to whether or not we feel safe psychologically being in that situation. So I’m hoping that this video helps you kind of get a heightened awareness of what that’s all about and use it, not only in your business life but in your personal life, to help, again, not only you achieve your goals but perhaps someone else as well.
Thanks so much for watching this video. My name is Patrick, reminding you as always to think bigger about your business, think bigger about your life.
Patrick Schwerdtfeger is a keynote speaker who has spoken at business conferences in North America, South America, Europe, Africa, the Middle East and Asia.