Patrick Schwerdtfeger is a motivational speaker who can cover the topic of sales training and the Law of State Transfer at your next business event. Contact us to check availability. The full transcript of the above video is included below.
Full Video Transcript:
Hi and welcome to another edition of Strategic Business Insights. Today we’re going to talk about the law of state transfer. What is the law of state transfer? Well, it’s something that is discussed quite often in social dynamics theory. It’s discussed in sales. It’s discussed with any type of human interaction analysis. Anyone who’s researching human interaction might refer to something called the law of state transfer. And what are we actually talking about? We’re talking about the fact that if I’m excited and I’m speaking with you, there’s a good chance that you’re going to start to get excited just because I’m excited. And likewise, if I’m negative, if I’m frustrated, if I’m angry, there’s a good chance that my state, my emotional state, will transfer onto you.
Now, this is accentuated if you’re the alpha in the conversation. So what does that mean? Well, in any situation, there’s going to be kind of a dominant communicator in the situation. You could look at groups of people at a social event or talking in a park or in a business environment, a networking environment, at a club at night or a restaurant – there’s always going to be one person who tends to be more dominant than the other. Well, in that situation, the person who’s acting as the alpha in that situation, their state is going to transfer more than the other people’s state will transfer.
Now, this is super-important when it comes to sales because, number one, in a sales situation, if you’re in sales—and frankly we’re all in sales in one area of our life or another so sales is a part of human existence. It’s certainly a part of business. So if you’re an entrepreneur or self-employed the way I am, sales is a regular part of your life. And even when you’re communicating with your spouse or your kids or your friends, there is an element of sales to all of those communications. Well, in sales training, one of the things that they need to teach people, and if they haven’t then I would say it’s probably not a very good sales course, is that you have to be the alpha in the conversation. So you have to be the dominant contributor to whatever the dialogue is going on. How do you do that? Well, as one example, the person who’s asking the questions is generally in the alpha situation. “So how do you feel about this? What is it that you’re looking for? What are you working on?” The person who’s asking questions is leading the conversation. So that’s essentially the alpha role in the conversation.
So if you’re in sales and you’re the alpha in the conversation, which you should be, then you need to know that your state is going to transfer to the person you’re speaking with, the prospect, the customer, whoever that might be. What does that mean? It means you have to believe in the product. When they say “you have to love your product” or “if you love your product, sales is easy,” that’s referring to the law of state transfer because if I believe in my heart that this is the solution, this is going to solve the person’s problem, then that emotional conviction in my mind is going to transfer to the person I’m speaking with and they’re going to inevitably start to feel the same way because they see it in me.
Now, what’s the flip side of that? What if you’re unsure? What if deep down inside you don’t necessarily believe in the product you’re selling? They’re going to know. They’re going to know. People know. People sense this kind of stuff. As human beings, we notice thousands of subtle little cues, little subcommunications, be they our eyes or how flush our skin is or how animated our facial expressions are. People sense that kind of stuff. Even when babies are just a few days old, they can already distinguish between a smiling face and a frowning face, and it’s 7 months. Seven months, babies already take your facial expressions as social cues for how they should be acting. So we’re hardwired to do this. Human beings are hardwired to look at each other’s all these thousands of little differences that take place when you really believe in something and you’re confident and you have conviction in it, versus another situation where maybe you’re not so sure and you don’t have that same level of belief. They’re going to notice it. They’re going to notice it. So you have to know, if you’re in sales and you’re selling a product that you don’t believe in, it’s going to be an uphill battle. It’s going to be an uphill battle for you.
Now, for me, I’m a speaker, that’s what I do for a living, so I have to get up in front of these people and speak. And the whole point for me, in other words, how this same concept applies to my own career, is that if I want the audience to get excited about my message, I have to be excited about it first. In other words, we always have to find the emotion we’re looking for in ourselves before we can expect to find it in somebody else. We have to find that emotion within ourselves. If I want people to laugh, I have to see the humor in what I’m saying first. I have to see it as funny myself if I expect the audience to laugh. I have to see the excitement and the opportunity and the implications of my message myself if I expect the audience to see it for themselves.
So this is true in all sorts of different situations. Now, let’s just talk about this within the realm of your personal life because it applies there too. If you want your partner, let’s say someone you’re in a relationship with, if you want them to share with you and talk about personal intimate subjects—maybe there’s a conversation that you want to have with that person and you’re afraid to do it because you don’t think they are going to share, you don’t feel that they’re going to be vulnerable themselves and be willing to talk about that intimate subject—you have to find that emotion within yourself first before you can expect to get it out of the other person. And I’m not saying it’s going to work every time because there are some people who hate talking about these sorts of personal subjects, so it may or may not work.
And by the way, the other is true as well. If you react to someone with anger, if you are angry at someone, there’s a good chance that that state is going to transfer as well and they’re going to react with anger back. That’s why arguments happen. That’s how arguments start, is that one person gets angry and starts yelling and screaming and the other person inevitably reacts in that same way and starts yelling and screaming back. So the state is just elevating and they’re just working their way up the ladder and getting more and more heated as time goes on.
So in all of these situations the purpose of this video is just to encourage you, like so many of my other videos, to heighten your level of awareness, cultivate awareness. Try to be more aware of how the state…like if you wake up one morning and you’re in a bad mood, if you don’t fix that bad mood, that state is going to transfer to other people in your life and they’re going to be in a bad mood back. The world is a reflection of yourself; I have a video on that. The world is a reflection of yourself. If you’re mean to people, they’re going to be mean back. If you’re kind to people, they’re going to be kind back. So cultivate awareness.
Let’s say you’ve had a bad day at work. When you go home to be with your spouse or your children, you need to know that that bad mood is going to transfer to them, so you need to deal with it on your drive home. Find a way to let it go. Find a way to let it go so you can be with your spouse and be positive. And if you’re positive with that person, or with those people in the case of your children, you’ve got a higher probability that they’re going to be positive back. It’s called the law of state transfer. And if you’re the alpha in any given situation, it happens every single day.
Thanks so much for watching. I appreciate it. My name is Patrick, reminding you as always to think bigger about your business, think bigger about your life.
Patrick Schwerdtfeger is a keynote speaker who has spoken at business conferences in North America, South America, Europe, Africa, the Middle East and Asia.